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Shyness is a complex emotion that is sometimes difficult to
understand. What’s important to remember is that it usually elicits feelings of
anxiety, fear, embarrassment, apprehension and tension in your student. Being
confrontational only exacerbates the problem, but there are ways in which you
can help your student to build confidence and participate in class activities.
When your students don’t participate, they miss out on vital social and
academic skills.
Be Understanding
Students aren’t shy because they choose to be. Accepting
their feelings as valid is the first step to overcoming them. According to
family therapist, Rose McAloon: "Be sure not to criticize your child for being
shy. And don't compare her with other kids or her siblings who may be more socially adept. Instead, respect her feelings and fears
and work around them."
Discuss ways in which shyness
can be practically overcome. Role-play scenarios like how to start a
conversation with someone your child would like to get to know better or how to
deal with bullies. Having an arsenal of prepared responses will help your child
to feel more confident. You can also ask them about situations which made them
uncomfortable in their daily interactions at school. Discussing the ways in
which your students could have responded will help them to feel more prepared.
Meeting strangers
If you bump into a friend and want your child to greet them,
but they are too shy, don’t apologize. Preempt this behavior by chatting with
your friend for a few minutes before you introduce your student. When your
student sees that you are comfortable, they are more likely to respond or make
eye contact.
Small groups
Most shy students find large groups intimidating. Instead, arrange
for one-on-one meetings with new people or new friends.
Preparing your student for large events will help to ease
their discomfort. If they have to perform at a school concert, practice their
part until they know it by heart. Then get them to perform it in front of your
family, then add some friends so that they are accustomed to performing in
front of a crowd.
Get them to visualize their performance, the stage, and all
the people in the audience. They should visualize themselves giving a successful
performance and feeling confident. The same technique can be used to great
effect when preparing for presentations.
Small challenges
Try to give your student small, confidence-building
challenges every day. Be sure to only give them challenges that they can cope
with as failure only helps to reinforce shy behavior. Be patient and
understanding and never push them too hard. While you should encourage them to
move outside of their comfort zones, let them move at their own pace.
Always build their confidence with praise. Focus on the
positive and don’t be over critical. Focus on their positive attributes and
help to build their confidence.
Get a tutor
If your student is not participating in class, you can help
to build their confidence by getting an in-home tutor. Here they can work in the comfort of their own homes which helps
them to feel secure and confident. They can overcome gaps in their knowledge
and feel more confident when answering questions in
class.
Find the Best In Home Tutoring in Longmont, Firestone, Erie,
Frederick Niwot, Dacono, and Mead. Our
Tutors focus on Tutoring Algebra, Math, English, Science, Chemistry, Biology,
SAT Prep, Test Prep, Homework Help and Foreign Languages
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